What Capello can learn from Monty

Before this WC I had never seen England lose a game. In fact I had never even seen them draw a game. Me watching England live meant we won. Alas this logic fell apart in SA in other ways too. How to explain our abysmal performances? Well, I think Monty has chosen his vice-captain Ryder Cup picks based on what England did wrong at the WC. For my Serbian friends, bear with me as I'm talking golf here. Tournaments create different needs and challenges to qualifying matches. A long time away from one's usual environment, isolated, stuck with fellow players and a disciplinarian coach, crushed England's team-spirit. Not even printing The Daily Mirror locally helped the boys. So Monty has picked Darren Clark as the team's court jester to jolly up the chaps ahead of the Americans coming to Wales. Couped up in Rustenburg the boys had no fun. No release. And it showed on the pitch. Mr Capello, before Poland-Ukraine 2012, please have a chat with Monty.

Once my friends at the Serbian FA learn of the 100% correlation of my being at their WC games and them being defeated, they will surely ban me from watching them live at any future tournaments. In Germany 2006, under the guise of Serbia & Montenegro, I saw all three of their WC games. They lost them all, conceding 6 to Argentina and 3 to the Ivory Coast. In SA I missed one of their games, the victory v Germany. And had Zigic not missed open goals v both Ghana and Australia, my 100% record would have been broken. In fact Zigic is beginning to look Heskey-esque the way he's missing open goals.

I made it to 7 of 9 WC host cities and 8 of 10 stadia. My favourite? Most definitely Loftus in Pretoria. Why? Well, it's in the heart of town; you can park your car nearby; Pretoria is a pleasant green and safe town and most importantly you are so close to the action. Soccer City was magnificent inside, though in the middle of nowhere with poor motorway access. Ellis Park is in a seriously dodgy part of Joburg which look as shabby as Wembley's surrounds. Rustenburg I have already commented on, and thank goodness England's finishing second in the group meant we didn't have to return there. Though that would have allowed me to play the Gary Player Golf Course at Sun City, the country's second best layout. Will save that for next time. Neslpruit had the cute giraffe stanchions and great views of the pitch but again was in the middle of nowhere and they only really had the post-game park and ride fully functional by the third of four games they hosted. I enjoyed watching NZ hold Italy there too so I could be partially biased here. In Polokwane I encountered the wonderful Argentina fans, every bit as fanatical, vocal and partial to a beer as the English. Nice stadium with good sight lines and located on the edge of the small town, within walking distance of the scarey, scruffy centre. Did you know that the Argentinian national anthem has no words? Nor did I. Durban was beautiful though they had a silly security set up which meant you had to walk miles out of the way to enter the (fenced off) entrance just in front of you. Still it has a running track, which had been covered in grass, so fans were a long way from the action. It took us ages to realise Torres was on the pitch v Switzerland due to his haircut which like Samson's just seemed to sap his powers. And Bloemfontein. Classic old rugby stadium which was only half-full for Honduras-Switzerland though packed for England v Germany. Great views of the pitch for all fans. Located next to a modern shopping mall in the centre of town. I can't love Bloem though given the outcome of our game v the Germans. Too many bad memories. So that's my subjective overview of all the grounds bar Port Elizabeth and Cape Town, where I never ventured due to their distance from every other venue.